Anointing the Lilith Within by Rita Lucey


Painting by Caroline Manière


A croning ritual honors the elders, those who hold the wisdom of a tribe. They are the teachers, healers, diplomats—the shamans and the priests. They care for the dying and help the spirit find its way into the light of the Goddess. Their presence belies fear and eases the gateway into another life. They are the crones, wise in their hard-earned autonomy. They are Lilith personified.

I became crowned—that is “croned”—by a Cherokee woman versed in the ancient native American ceremony. In her lifetime, each woman journeys through the aspects of Goddess—maiden, mother and crone. After a year of preparation, I was ready to accept the mantle of cronehood.

The ceremony holds all the elements of many ageless traditions— fire, water, oil, air and earth. Prior to passing through a wooden archway, I stated what I wanted to leave behind and on the other side, declared what I wanted to embrace. After the words, came the rituals—smudging with herbal incense lit from a sacred fire; shedding my clothing in a sheeted tent; and anointing with sacred corn oil, sage and other wisdom herbs. Finally, I donned new clothing, giving witness to who and what I wanted to become. Placing my old clothing on the arch, I left it behind, wading through a pool of water.

When all was completed—each element addressed—the arch was set on fire. Oh such mixed emotions! The fire consumed the garments of a fulfilled past, while promising new beginnings. Yes, the spirit of Lilith’s presence sang a hymn of praise in the depth of my newly crowned being. A song welcoming me to this moment in time and space, welcoming me to my cronehood.

The sisterhood—present to witness and acclaim my worthiness to be so honored—prepared scones and tea, sharing in the blessedness that left us in eternal space. My sense of the ethereal oneness with the universe—the belonging to a force greater than myself—lasted for days. It was almost surreal, and at times I needed to remind myself to stay grounded in the here and now. My crowning ushered in an epiphany, a sense of limitless time and space.

For the Liliths of this world—both the celebrated and the unknown—the alabaster jar is open. Just as women opened the jar and anointed Jesus, so we anoint one another in our sharing of the Lilith Spirit. In our crowning years and beyond, we continue to grow in our understanding of who we are in relation to the universe and to this Great Mystery.

An excerpt the Girl God Anthology, Original Resistance: Reclaiming Lilith, Reclaiming Ourselves.



Rita Lucey, wife, mother, grandmother and great grandmother, was ordained a Roman Catholic priest at age 80, fulfilling a lifetime dream. (Yes, contrary to Roman Catholic Canon Law 1024, and excommunicated as a result.)  A human rights activist, at age 65, she spent six months in federal prison for non-violent protest against our government’s training of Latin American military.  In recent years, she served on the boards of her local Amnesty International and ACLU chapters. She continues to be active in the local League of Women Voters and is a frequent contributor to the opinion pages of the Orlando Sentinel and Daytona Beach News Journal.

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