|Painting by Danielle Boodoo-Fortuné|
I was sought out by a man 6 years older than me at the tender age of 16. As he pursued a close friend of mine at the age of 17, he patiently waited until I turned 18. We got together one time only which was a very traumatic experience. In short he raped me. I was very vocal about withdrawing my consent yet he did not honor that request. At the age of 30 I am just now coming to terms with the severity of the situation and how I'll never get the proper justice for what he's done to me. He met our daughter 3 years after her birth and has used his male privilege and financial status to shame me as a woman and mother. His lack of respect for me is the same as the time he raped me. I am currently in the middle of a custody battle. This happened in retaliation to me demanding child support as he does not properly support her. He then took to the law to legally harass me through his lawyer by requesting sole custody to evade paying child support. He used my financial status against me to make me out as a bad mother. Countless frivolous motions... I struggle with the stress of caring for my children, having to suppress my feelings, and dealing with the harassment while constantly being scrutinized, demonized, and held to an unrealistic standard simply because I'm a woman.
-Jakki McIntosh - Check out her blog: Memoirs of A Single Black Mother.
A selection from the upcoming Girl God Anthology, Single Mothers Speak on Patriarchy
Jakki McIntosh is a 30-year-old single mother of 3 girls who are budding feminists. Aside from being a full-time mother and holding down a full-time job, she is also a college student. Thrust into a world ruled by patriarchy and laden misogyny, she navigates life the best she can while rearing her children and working to empower women.